old blog.soupstain.com: July 2005

soupstaindotcom

Another wonderful contribution from Same Guy Productions for the benefit of all.

All In a Days Work

This is mine and Sonia's office. Sonia is the coolest office buddy ever.

(click and drag to look around my office)

Enhance It

Don't you hate it when you are watching a show on TV, and they have a picture that they are "studying" and can't put the pieces together to solve whatever problem they have... then out of nowhere, someone points to an inconspicuous area of the photograph and says, "enhance this part." Then it all becomes perfectly clear that there is a face in the reflection off a spoon that solves the mystery. Well, while eating pizza, after eating pizza, still at the restaurant, but definitely finished eating, somehow my camera accidentally fired and took a picture of the pizza pan. I didn't think anything of it, until I "enhanced" it.

It all makes sense now. Houston is such a good town that street intersections

(what country are we in?)... have halo's over them.

There was this guy mowing his lawn with the coolest hard hat

I had ever seen. It was like an aluminum safari hat. I took lots of pictures. This is me not taking a picture of Kristy.

While driving down the road to the Apple store, all of a sudden the road was flooded.

I swear I was taking a picture of the cars driving thru the water.

I took a detour and finally made it to the Apple store.

I wanted to go ice skating.

But it isn't fun going ice skating by yourself. I wanna drive a zamboni.

I want to make a movie that follows the random thought process of a dream, that seems to make sense when you are having it.

Socially Dead

So... Last night I was working on a research paper.

Somehow, by 10 o'clock

I was dead tired. So I went to sleep. I woke up at 5 in the a.m. and couldn't sleep. I layed there til 6. I downloaded some geocaches to my GPS.

Thought about finding some but they aren't fun by yourself. I changed the color of the apple on my iBook.

I used green transparency.

I took some pictures. Some people ask why I bought a new camera when I already had one. Here is the reason:

The moral: Stay up late because getting up early is boring and sucks. Early to rise, Early to bed, Makes a man healthy But socially dead.

Google is the best

I'll be brief. Today's subject will be the wonderful world of Google. All I will say is http://moon.google.com and http://earth.google.com. I will be brief because you will spend the next hour at least playing on these wonderfully uselessish applications. On the moon, zoom all the way in. On the earth, you have to download it first (only windows at this time, all in time). Then check out big cities (i.e. Dallas, New York...) and check the "Buildings" box at the bottom. And also, go to the mountains, say in Salt Lake City, Utah. Make sure the "Terrain" box is checked. That's all I have to say about that.

It's really easy to find...

If you can get to the dam... take 35 like you're going to hillsboro, take exit that says Whitney, follow signs to Lake Whitney, off of 277 - Lake Whitney State Park. Going down Lake Shore towards Woodway, turn right on 19th, make another right. Where Brendan and Leigh Moore live, there's a gas station, and a Pizza Hut, and a light. Turn right on that road, take all the way til there's a light you have to stop at and then you go right, then you go right again, you're on 277 east, turn left on lake Whitney State Park. Go over dam. Pass it, head toward actual city of Whitney - 7 miles from the dam to the park. Its really easy to find. Once you get to the park, there's going to be a code 0630 push pull. Come in. There are different signs for different campsites, go to camp 52.

Washed the Spider Out

So, there's this spider. His name is Henry. Henry and I have this relationship of trust thing going on. See... it all started many years ago... (begin flashback sequence) Every night (or so it seemed) I would come home and walk to the back door and be attacked

by a spider web strung right across the path. Stupid spider, I'd always say as I spasmatically pulled spider web out of my hair. Eventually, being human and capable of learning, I'd walk back with my arm in front of my face. Every spider web built across my path, I'd destroy. This must have sucked for Mr. Spider. Imagine spending such a long time going back and forth across this path to make this beautiful web, knowing that all kinds of insects would be traveling right thru this path. But you forgot about me, idiot. I don't like you making webs across my path. Then, imaging this spider crying because some stupid human knocked his net down. Imagine his family when he goes home to tell them that there'll be no food tonight. No roast moth. No pickled junebug. Just dirt. Eventually, being arachnid and capable of learning, he would build his web a little bit higher.

At least 6 foot 3 inches off the ground so the most careless idiots would walk by unknowing to themselves that they nearly escaped immediate incapacitation. Imagine the looks on all 5,000 kids faces when daddy brings home a real live moth, the size of a quarter, enough to feed them all. What joy they'll feel. So the trust. Henry knows that if he builds his web high enough, I won't bother him. I know that if I don't bother him, he'll build his web high enough, and I won't bother him, so he'll build his web... Yesterday... in comes another spider. Imagine Henry's horror. It was the look on the face of K-mart when Wal-mart moved in across the corner. When Henry built his web, high above the path, another spider jumped at the chance and took this prime real-estate, right in the middle of the path. Henry knew what was going to happen. "Excuse me, but, uh,.. I wouldn't.." But he kept his silence, knowing that if he keeps his side of the bargain, I'll keep mine. As soon as I stepped onto the path, I saw him. He was sitting there all snug waiting for his next meal. But this was my path. I would have none of this. I destroyed his nights achievement in less than 3 consecutive seconds. I looked up to Henry and said, "Goodnight," and went to bed.

Tonight, at common grounds, this big oof

walked around the corner carrying his laptop like his woman,

by the screen.

Wasabi Revisited

A long time ago (March) I wrote a blog titled "fitty dolla bill."

March 3, 2005 Julies name in my phone was "Fajitas*." Today I changed it to "Wasabi." If someone puts a high enough price on anything, someone is going to do it. This is why I will never bet someone that they won't eat something gross, hot, or otherwise just nasty. Brandon said to Julie, "I'll give you $50 if you eat this huge chunk of wasabi." Julie says, "Ok." Eats it with no reaction at all. Not even worth the $50. I guess someone should have mentioned Julie's unmatched jalepeno-eating contest record. Brandon was sad. *The name "Fajitas" is indicative of Julie's standard menu item of choice.

This is important because 4 months later, Brandon still owes Julie $30. So tonight he gives her $3. And she says that if he eats this tube of wasabi