eye of the beholder

My lactose-intolerant, arthritis-striken cat had to go to the vet. Poor little fella. On the way there, pulled in to the bank behind an elderly gentleman. Instead of pulling in to a parking space and stopping, he hit the gas and jumped the curb and hit the pole almost flying through the front glass doors. Had to pry the door away from the fender so the old fart could get out. The blame? The new boots. That's even what he told the cops. "Are you hurt?" the cop said. "Just my back a little, it's these damn new boots." Robinson must have been extremely boring that morning because 2 cops, 1 undercover detective, and 1 firetruck showed up in about 35 seconds. Jasper has an eye infection and it stinks. How about when you take a drive to the bank. You're feelin' pretty good. An old pal drives by and gives you a wave. Just feelin' pretty good. Gonna get some money to buy something nice for the lady. Pull in nice and easy to the bank. Maybe a necklace and flowers. Hit the brakes and damn boots slide off onto the gas. I guess the lady'll have to wait. Gotta fix this damn pole at the bank.