Aliens, dead birds, cops, dancers and a sword fight

It all started with Horchata. Trying to mind our own business, Kristy, Melissa, and I went to an Hispanic establishment

for a nice refreshing Horchata. When we drove up I instantly knew something wasn't right. Either all the Mexicans had been abducted or they just couldn't spell. I'm going with the first idea. I was quiet. I didn't want to arouse any suspicion on just a hunch. The second sign that I was correct came moments later when we got our "Horchata." Knowing that some species of aliens are quite horrid with their abductees, I knew that this wasn't Horchata. In fact, it was the juice from the brains of the abducted Mexicans. Instead of partaking in the cannibalism, I threw my "Horchata" away, disgusted at the idea of drinking someone's thoughts. I wouldn't be able to understand them, they're in Spanish. We went to another Hispanic establishment and drank our Horchata with ease, knowing that there were no ideas floating around in it this time. Our troubles were over. Or were they? Everything I know about aliens is this: they kill birds,

they steal cable,

and they eat cellophane.

My understanding of this much more advanced civilization will soon be expanded further than I can understand. To make a long story short, we ran into the aliens again.

Turns out they are very nice people creatures. My misconceptions start at the Horchata. I was, indeed, correct in the fact that the Mexicans were abducted, but my fears of drinking Mexican brain juice was completely false. The truth is these aliens just aren't very good at making Horchata. They let us ride in their flying saucer.

They told us that they don't use flying saucers any more because they aren't fuel efficient. I called it a "UFO" and one stared at me firmly for a second and said, "It is not a UFO." Whatever that means. They use Econoline vans now. They showed us their big screen TV

in their econoline. They really like Vegi-tales. These extra-terrestrials are harmless to humans. They feel like we could live together in peace and harmony. But, they said, there is a problem with another species of alien. They are trying to take over the world. SUVs and cell-phones are the creation of these monsters. They need to be stopped. We told them we would help. The first mission: An alien posing as a bad dancer.

She needed to be stopped before she made the whole world vomit. We would need all the help we can get. Luckily, nearby, a quincenera

was taking place. We asked for their help. They drew their swords

and fell in to help. Hostages were locked in a hotel conference rooms

all over. Ok, so I'm bored writing this and I don't like it anymore. So if you just look at the pictures... sorry if you already read it. Anyways, I've decided that it doesn't matter how good I drive, police are always going to be out to get me. I was being a model citizen when I ran into a police blockade.

I stopped like I was supposed to. And the police man gave me a freakin' ticket for not having my drivers license. I went the speed limit the whole day! I stopped at every stop sign. I had no need of being pulled over. UGH!!! That just pissed me off again so I'm done writing. Instead of ringing up your food and swiping your card, some restaurants have decided that it is better if you do it yourself,

and charge you $1.50 to do it yourself, and call it an ATM. To see pics more pics from this lovely weekend, go to my gallery and the aliens are here.