Sho-gunn'ed

Today a man chased me around Men's Wearhouse with a measuring tape. He caught me. My friend Knick called and told me that he was getting married. Poor fella. Maybe I'm just jealously bitter. So I say to Knick, well, I just got engaged yesterday. Wanna talk to my fiance? So I hand the phone to Sonia. She starts talking to him in Farsi and says at the end, "uh, justin, i love, yes." I get the phone back and tell him that she doesn't speak much English, I got her in the mail yesterday. She's my Iranian mail-order-bride. Being in an experimental mood, I went to a restaurant with Brandon. It was a sushi bar. Being the unexperimental person that I am, I've never had real sushi. I tend to get what I always get, eat what I always eat, and be happy with the tried and true. Nah, not this time. I got something that I don't know what it is. Very bad Engrish probably on that last sentence. So we're sitting there and Brandon says, maybe we should ask what it is. If I ask what it is, I won't get it because I wouldn't want to try it. So we ordered the same thing. A little while later, this guy was at a counter making some food. It looked like he had cut a leaf and made a decoration out of it and put it on the food. There was a vase with flowers in it and what looked like the same leaf. So we joked that the guy was getting bored with his job and was experimenting to see what kind of random things he could put on peoples dish and still have them eat it. The the lady brought it to us. It was ours. If I had know what I ordered looked like this I would have not ordered it. So we asked the lady how to eat it. She was amused.